‘HELP!’ For Humans

If you are reading this, it is for a reason.

You may know someone who is suffering depression and you want to help.

You may be suffering yourself, and in need of help.

Someone who cares about you may have sent you the link to this page. 

Or you may just be curious about what you may find here.

Maybe there is something you can learn from my sharing.

One thing is for sure, more people are talking about depression and how widespread it is and how devastating it can be, and the more people who share their journey, and more importantly, their success in healing, the more hope there is to share with someone who has lost all hope. Awareness is growing of the importance of openness and willingness to share.

Because if you have experienced, or still do experience that utter hell hole of zero hope, like there is just water in your veins instead of blood, like your insides have turned to concrete, like every waking moment feels like a funeral, then you know what I am talking about, and my reason for writing this part of my website is to find you, wherever you may be, to give you a message:


So I’m going to share my story, to show you that it is possible to walk through it and out the other side, healthier, wiser, happier, with renewed hope, self worth,  and with an enthusiasm for living, made more precious and valuable by virtue of the painful experience of depression.

I am now in great shape, I don’t suffer from depression, I sleep well, I have an excellent business, and I value and appreciate myself. But, from where I’ve been, to where I am now, has been to hell and back…….

On the 10th October, 2014, I swallowed 30 clonazepam tablets after I had been awake for 120 hours following withdrawals from going cold turkey off Effexor XR anti depressants.

It wasn’t that I wanted to die. I just didn’t want to be awake any more. It is hard to describe the torture of not being able to sleep for day after relentless day, going to work like a zombie, and coming home to more sleeplessness. The SAS don’t train their guys past 72 hours because they know, after that, madness sets in.

I was always reluctant to try anti depressants, as I preferred to regard myself as feeling unhappy about various things, past and present,  rather than depressed. I saw depression as having a reason, to be resolved, but not by a happy pill.

But when it went on and on, and I couldn’t see the wood for the trees, I went to my doctor, and for seven weeks I tried these damned pills.  In the end, I couldn’t think properly, and I felt worse than ever. I couldn’t work out if I had to plug the vacuum cleaner in before switching it on, or was it the other way around??  My mind had gone numb.

So I went cold turkey. And I went down and down into the abyss for 120 hours. From Sunday morning, onwards, I was awake. Each day I went to work, on autopilot.

On the Friday after work, my doctor, who had prescribed me the Effexor XR, and who knew I had been feeling suicidal, gave me a pot of 30 clonazepam pills. Smart move. He knew I had been awake for so long, I was sliding into a death wish. Yet once again, the good old medical profession knows best and pills are the answer.

I defy anybody to maintain a rational mind after 120 hours of sleeplessness.

I went home, wrote a note, swallowed the lot, and lay down.

Midday the next day, I woke up on a gurney with paramedics looking down at me.

I spent Saturday night in hospital with heart monitors stuck all over my chest, and was bought home on Sunday morning. The next day I went to work.

At this point, I realised, I had to do something radical or I was going to continue to suffer. I knew my depression and deep sense of hopelessness was anchored in childhood. I decided to adopt  a motto:  Take Ownership, Take Responsibility, Take Action. Now.

So I began researching, and I found a whole world of diet based solutions that specifically empowered me with the capacity and energy to address the deep seated issues I was carrying.

Let me make it clear now: I do not suggest anybody does what I did on 10th October.  I do not recommend going cold turkey the way I did. I am simply sharing what worked for me.

I got massage, Bowen therapy, acupuncture. I went bike riding daily with my dog. Well she ran, and I rode the bike….

I bought a spa pool. Wonderful!

I reflected on the meaning of the words of Hippocrates, (to whom the medical profession swear an oath……!!!)  “Let thy food be thy medicine, and let thy medicine be thy food”.

I stopped drinking alcohol, (I’m a non smoker) stopped drinking milk, reduced my red meat intake, I don’t drink coffee, I avoid sugar like the plague it is, and I use a set of superfoods that are known to have a profound impact on mental health, and have been proven to be more effective than anti depressants, without the negative side effects.

  1. Turmeric.
  2. Cacao powder
  3. Coconut oil
  4. Nuts & seeds
  5. Spirulina
  6. Organic Coconut sugar
  7. Hemp seed fibre.
  8. Kelp

All of these ingredients can be used in a daily smoothie. Have a look at my smoothie recipes. You can also read of the nutritional content of all ‘HELP!’ ingredients in the ‘HELP!ful Nutrition’ page.

I ate foods that are known serotonin boosters, like broccoli, garlic, brussell sprouts, spinach, and I made sure I got a daily intake of the oh! so essential MAGNESIUM!

This is a biggie. Magnesium deficiency affects 80% of the population, due to depletion in the food chain, and over use of supermarket processed foods. We have over 300 metabolic processes that depend on magnesium to function properly, including absorption of food nutrients that produce serotonin.

Magnesium deficiency leads to depression, anxiety, sleep disorders, cramps, stress build up, irritability and impotence, to name but a few.

And here is the BIG ALERT that the drop in mood gives you, that downward spiral you feel, that uprising of despair, that plunge into morbidity:

It is all TELLING you, your mood is WARNING you, ‘ALARM! ALARM!  SEROTONIN RUNNING LOW! ALARM! ALARM!’  This is the time to act with urgency, and quickly use a dietary based strategy that lifts you back up again, and kick starts the brain’s hormone factory again.

I did all of these things, and I gained a sense of authenticity; I was able to face the pain of childhood trauma and work through it; I was able to get healthy sleep and charge my batteries properly. My brain was producing the right level of what I call the currency of hope, serotonin. I became calmer, less reactive, peaceful, I felt safer and optimistic.

I highly recommend my ‘HELP!’ smoothies.

If you google Kelly Brogan MD,s page, and check out what she has to say about diet and depression, you will see she validates my method absolutely. 

It is a twist in the system of things, that we are given medication to deal with the consequences of a dietary deficiency, and it is interesting to note that one in six Americans take anti depressants. That’s 13% of the entire population.

That is an extraordinary level of dependency on medication for mental health, prescribed by the medical profession,  and a complete reversal of the philosophy of Hippocrates, the very man they swear an oath to!

I now take magnesium supplements daily, along with my superfood smoothie.

I don’t get depressed. I learned that if there are deep issues to be faced that are causing depression, then it is vital to boost the brain capacity to produce endorphins and serotonin, to move through the healing process without suffering a collapse. This uplift can happen quite fast, within a few days of intake of the blend of superfoods I use. Then, there can be a shift in perspective that enables you to take the net step towards healing, via counselling and therapy. You get to take control over your life and your direction.  You start to use the nutrients as a way of self care, and self love. You feel better because you are better in health. So that improves mental health, and in this way you can go from strength to strength.

But, it is in reaching out, asking for help, letting go of shame, sharing, accepting, that the deepest healing takes place.

You start to gain some sense of hope. And when you experience the benefits of self care, you don’t lose that. You always have that from then on and you know that you have the power to get yourself out of a dark place.

Not only that, you have the power to share your story, how you did it, where you’ve been and where you are now, just like I am doing here.

And when you do this, you hope that someone may be reading it, who really gets what you are trying to say, knows you understand, and feels just that little bit less alone in this world, enough to reach out and ask  for,  dare I say it,  Help!.

Thanks for reading.